Mock Thesis Defense: Justifying Blogging When I Could Be Revising Essays

I have a serious need to repent.  I intended to write this post over a week ago, but here we are.  Let's be honest-I just collapsed after finals and fell off the radar.  But now it is time to get back in the game, and without further delay because my honors thesis is due January 16th.

I want to take a minute and comment on what I have learned from my mock thesis defense and from my latest post that goes over a draft of my final essay in my collection, "Snot and Untold Stories."  The mock thesis defense was done as a final presentation in my Thesis Writing class.  Another student who acted as my representative contacted Professor Burton and received some good questions to ask me, one of which was this: how do I justify spending valuable time blogging and focusing on the digital component of my thesis when I could spend that time doing much-needed revising?

It is a good question, and after my latest post highlighting concerns with my essay I am more equipped to answer it.

Since posting my latest draft, I have received a few great comments with invaluable feedback.  While I admit I have not had as many people comment as I would have liked, the comments I did receive were incredible.  Shara, who I connected with while in India, took a good chunk of time to give me some much-needed suggestions.  Had I not blogged about this draft, I would not have received that feedback.  In this case, blogging has actually aided me in the traditional revision process.

A second, less obvious benefit to blogging that I have discovered within the last few weeks, has been that I am held accountable to a "real" audience.  Within a day after posting my essay, the German friend I met on the bus mentioned in my essay, who I renamed Charley, contacted me and mentioned he read it.  My initial reaction was concern.  Had I really represented him accurately?  For all of my talk of authenticity, was I holding to it?  The truth is I fused a little bit of a later conversation I had with a history major friend to include a few of the Vietnam details.  By having this post I am acknowledging the fragile nature of storytelling while also being held accountable to an immediate audience.  This is not available in mainstream publishing.

In conclusion, while blogging and adding this digital component of my thesis can be time consuming and daunting, I am glad to have done it.  At the end of the day I would rather have my ideas shared and available to read than have them be perfect.

(Photo credit goes to cs.cmu.edu)

Me talking through my final essay "Snot and Untold Stories."

Hi Everyone!

 As I'm going through the drafting process, I am in need of some solid feedback.  Here is a jing video link (screen shot software) with me talking through my latest draft of "Snot and Untold Stories."  The entire draft is posted below.  Anyway, if you have any suggestions on the points that I raise, or additional feedback, I would appreciate it!

Click Here

Snot and Untold Stories

My host grandma was a snot-flinger.

            We would sit together each evening, my Tibetan host grandma and I, on the veranda of our second story housing complex, overlooking the lush Himalayan valley in Dharamsala, India.  As the sun would nestle into the horizon for the night and the stars would gradually pop out like watchful eyes in the indigo sky, savory smells of Sunam’s dinner simmering on the stove would sweep through the air.  While sitting out in the open air, the culmination of the day, I would read, sometimes scribbling down some fragmented thoughts in the dimming light, trying to be a real writer, while my host grandma would fumble with a string of ivory-colored prayer beads, occasionally flinging visible amounts of mucus off the second story of the balcony in a swift motion with the back of her hand.  The leftovers she smeared on the chair without shame.  She was an eighty, maybe ninety-year-old woman (no one from Tibet seemed to record their birthday) with unusually large pupils, wire-like hair parted in a thick, balding line right down the middle her head, and facial features oriented not unlike a Picasso portrait.

Snot and Untold Stories

"Snot and Untold Stories" is the last essay in my collection which looks at what I learned about the Tibetan situation (and American situation) while I was in India.  It seeks to address the indescribable and untouchable parts of my experience that I could not quite translate- yet, the stories were still there.

I have not received a lot of feedback on this essay yet, but am looking forward to some here in the near future.

Here are some posts that have helped pave the way for this essay:

• A blog post about my host grandma
• A first draft of my essay (forthcoming)
• The LHA Website
• My book review of Tibet, Tibet
• My book review of the Autobiography of the Dalai Lama
• My thoughts at the Pakistan/Indian border 
• Me, talking through a recent draft 
• Realizations about social media benefits in light of this essay while challenging authenticity

(Photo credit  istock)

Om Mani Padme Hum: Compassion, Charity, and a Headache

This was potentially the hardest piece of writing I have ever tried to write.  This essay explores my difficulties coming to terms with charity and compassion within myself and my group members.

The biggest change I have made to this essay has been trying to make it more objective at the advice of Professor Bennion.  I've tried to do so, meaning I've been forced to try and make sense of it and see it from all angles.  It is still a work in progress, but I think I am getting closer.

I'm also trying to add more descriptions and make the writing more clear in general.  I'm having some of the same issues I had with "A Bus to Dharamasla" in keeping the present and past separated. 

Here are some posts that helped inspire this essay:

• Listen to the Om Mani Padme Hum mantra for compassion
• A few segments from a first draft (forthcoming)
• Maybe a few journal entries (forthcoming)
• Feedback from Professor Bennion (especially the victim and objectivity parts)
• I need more ideas...

A Slightly Unconvincing, but Trying to be More so, Defense of Marriage

This is the third essay in my collection about me grappling with the idea of marriage while I was in India.  I had a good time writing this, though I have not done enough drafting yet.  Here are some changes I have made/want to make so far.

More setting details, a better conclusion, reorganizing material so that I am not "spilling the beans too early" as Dr. Burton says.

Here are some posts that have been foundational to this essay:

• A  first draft (forthcoming)
• A blog post about my relationship with Patrick
• Attending a Tibetan wedding
• Journal entry/realization that I need to decide where I stand with marriage (forthcoming)
• Getting my palm read

(Photo credit to Wikipedia)

Monks and Mormons

My essay "Monks and Mormons" is the second one in my collection.  It is not yet in a form I am satisfied with, but it has come a long way. It addresses my disillusionment with Buddhism as I came to learn more about it and better understanding and appreciating my own religious beliefs.  I used to think that if I were not a Mormon I would be a Buddhist, but after this summer I've learned that this is not so.  Though I still have loads of appreciation for Eastern religious philosophy and love the Buddhists I met, I am happy being Mormon.

General changes?  Trying to make it a more interesting read, making episodes clearer,  being more articulate and respectful about the differences between these two religions, and changing the title and beginning of the essay.

Here are some posts/drafts/field note entries that document the journey of this essay:

• My first terrible draft
• A journal entry (forthcoming)
• FAQ on 1st week in McLeod Ganj (have I met the Dalai Lama yet)
• Third Time Seeing the Dalai Lama video
• Yoga teacher training
• Varanasi email to my parents
• Varanasi scene I never got around to using, but I might do something with in the future

(Photo Credit Charleston Tibetan Society)

A Bus to Dharamsala

"A Bus to Dharamsala" was the first essay and only personal essay I began drafting while I was in India.  Because it has been around the longest, I've had lots of much needed drafting and work shopping done with it.  Major changes include changing characters, being more explicit about what I learned about myself on this journey, transitioning from past to present more clearly, adding more sensory detail, and fixing minor (but important) errors like calling Copernicus Copernicus and not CoPORNicus. 

Here are some important steps I made getting this essay to a polished state:

• My blog post talking about my first bus ride to Dharamsala which is what this is based on
• A first draft
• A third draft
• Feedback from Professor Bennion
• A blog post about my relationship with Patrick
• My Ghana blog

(Photo credit Audleyblog.com)

Integrating Blogging into my Personal Essays

After meeting last week with one of my faculty mentors, Dr. Burton, I have a lot on my mind in terms of this honors thesis and ebook I am trying to create.

I sent all 87 pages of my manuscript to Dr. Burton.  He printed them out.  All of them.  They were stacked there in the middle of his desk.  It was nice to see how much work I have done, but unsettling how much of that pile still in desperate need of editing.  While I am not anticipating publishing my ebook until March, my honors thesis needs to be turned in by January 15th.  I would panic, but I don't think I have time to.

So now that I am in crunch time, where am I at?  What do I need to do?  Well, for starters I'm going to create 5 hub posts about each of my 5 essays.  In the printed format of my thesis, there will be typed URL's if a reader wants to find out more about the blog posts that made up this essay, earlier drafts, critiques, etc. to document the journey.  The eBook format will include hyperlinks.

I'm also changing up my introduction and post script to be more argumentative about blogging by acknowledged the Pandora's Box that comes with it.  I need to include more sources on blogging, though with it being such a new medium it is difficult to find them.  That should be noted in my intro.

So in addition to traditional revisions, keep a look out for some funky experiments on this blog.

(Photo credit forbes.com)